David Cameron to Star in Rebooted Carry On Movies

Ooh err...

David Cameron gives a speech
Prime Minister David Cameron, speaking at the opening of the GAVI Alliance immunisations pledging conference in London, June 13 2011

Sources inside Downing Street today failed to deny the growing rumours that David Cameron is set to be the new face of the Carry On movies.

The bawdy British comedies are set for a 21st century makeover, and it now looks certain that the outgoing Prime Minister will be playing a leading role in the first two new movies.

Sources close to the Carry On comedy team have failed to put to bed rumours that Cameron will play a slightly camp gynaecology consultant called Lance in the upcoming flick. And betting giant Ladbrokes has suspended all betting on the PM taking the role.

Tim Dawson is one of the writers responsible for creating the first Carry On movie for 25 years, and he talked in glowing terms about the Prime Minister’s credentials.

“Everything about David just screamed Carry On. From his comedy comb-over to his sexist attitudes, he’s the throwback to 1960s Britain we’ve been looking for.

“We have sort of always known that Cameron was the man for the job. But when he told that woman MP to ‘calm down dear’, we knew we had to get him.”

The new movie is reported to be entitled ‘Carry On Doctors’, and it is set to feature some of Britain’s best young comedians.

Sources close to the project are planning to make Cameron’s character arrogant, out of touch and pompous. The producers don’t want to give Cameron too much to do in his first acting role.

Fred Bannister is an executive producer, and he can’t wait for Cameron to start filming his scenes.

“We’re going to give David some fantastic storylines. Expect him to be slapping arses, pulling faces and delivering classic double entendres at every juncture. We’ll even have him accidentally falling onto busty female patients in their beds.”